10 OUTDATED Style & Etiquette Rules You Need To STOP Following ASAP

10 OUTDATED Style & Etiquette Rules You Need To STOP Following ASAP


10 OUTDATED Style & Etiquette Rules You Need
To STOP Following ASAP [0:00:00]
[Music] In today’s video, gents, ten outdated style
and etiquette rules that you need to stop following. First up, stop opening doors for women. Yeah! They want everything to be equal, well, slam
that door right in their face. No, no, no seriously that’s not what I mean
by this point. The outdated etiquette rule I’m saying get
rid of is only opening doors for women. My thoughts on this, how about be a gentlemen
to everybody; open doors for women, men, children, pretty much anybody that needs help. And, I’ve seen guys down in the comments
say that they don’t open doors for women because, hey, what if it’s a feminist and
she gets up in my face and start attacking me. Seriously, guys, what are the chances that’s
going to happen? And if they do, okay, you open them for everybody,
so what is this person’s problem? You open that door for anyone that needs help
and that’s the point I’m trying to get to, guys, is that a gentleman looks out for
anyone, anyone that he can help anyone that you can offer assistance to. Now, what about the old school rule that a
man should always pay for the first date? Guys, I’m not going to touch this one because
nine out of ten women still expect men to pay on the first date. And, honestly if you want a second date, I
think it’s worth compromising here. And, if you really don’t like that, well,
how about you just tell her, hey, we had a great time, I’ll pay for this first one,
you get the next one. Next up, we’ve got the etiquette rule that
a man should wait for a woman to extend her hand before you extend yours for a handshake. Now, if you go back and you read the etiquette
books written forty, fifty years ago, you will find this rule still written, I think
it’s incredibly outdated. The modern rule here whether it’s a man
or a woman in Western culture whenever you’re coming up to a person you haven’t met before,
you want to introduce yourself. One of the most common ways that we introduce
ourselves is with a handshake. So, go ahead and extend your hand basically
you’re encouraging and you’re showing a leadership role by basically starting the
greeting. Now, what about the rule that a man should
always be to the left of a woman when they’re walking? Basically, you want a woman to your right. Is this a rule that you should follow? Only if you’re carrying a sword. Whenever you pull your sword, obviously if
your sword is between you and the woman, you could actually cut her. So, not something you want to do, but most
of the time you’re not carrying a sword, so in that case, you can walk to the left
or to the right. Unless, it’s the queen, then walk behind. Now, what about the rule no elbows on the
table? I’m going to say that you don’t have to
follow this anymore which is funny because I enforce it at my house and my daughter catches
me all the time, I’m pretty bad about putting my elbows on the table. But, this goes back to an old rule whenever
table is basically had trestle tables and that was when parts of the table would pull
out, it couldn’t take much weight, so when you would put your elbows on it, guess what? The whole table would fall down, all the dishes
would smash. I mean it was a functional reason you didn’t
put the elbows on there. So, go ahead put your elbows on that table,
when someone say something to you, you can inform, you know, let him know a little bit
about history and how it really doesn’t apply anymore. Now, what about the rule of tucking in your
shirt? It really depends on the type of shirt. So, dress shirts, they’re designed to be
tucked because they’ve got longer tails. Now, what about casual button-downs? So, casual button-downs descended out of the
dress shirt, but they brought in a wide variety of colors, pockets, epaulettes, all different
types of designs and also the tail the bottom of the shirt was changed up, they were made
shorter. And, it really depends on the length of the
shirt. The key to ignoring this rule is to understand
there are exceptions. I do recommend a man tucking most shirts,
but there are many shirts designed to actually be worn untucked; t-shirts, polos, the guayabera
which is technically a dress shirt. So, when I say all dress shirts should be
tucked in, there is an exception to that. When you understand that these hard and fast
rules are more like guidelines, you understand that you can break them. Next up, we’ve got no brown in town and
we’ve got no white after Labor Day. You can safely ignore these rules. Why did they even exist to begin with? Because it was a way to separate old money
from new money. So, old money, they have these certain rules,
these guidelines that they followed and they were able to identify who’s in with the
crowd and those that break them even if they’ve got the money to afford the parties to be
able to wear the type of clothing, we know that they’re not part of the crowd. Now, a lot of that stuff has gone away. Yes, you will still see it in certain societies
that they have these rules that still exist. For the vast majority of us, you can pretty
much ignore this stuff. The next outdated style rule you could throw
out the window, always wear a suit to an interview. I love suits I think that they make men look
great, they make them look strong, masculine, but the problem with the suit is it’s not
appropriate for every type of interview. You’ve got to find out what – what is
that company’s dress code, then maybe step one level above that at least meet it. But, if you’re going to be working let’s
say with your hands in a blue collar position, don’t show up in a suit. If you’re going to be working for a very
casual company, just kind of shows, you know, at a company that doesn’t require it, it
just shows that you’re out of touch, you didn’t do your homework and you need to
find out. Talk with the people at HR, talk to the people
that are going to be conducting this interview. It’s on you to find what that dress code
is and to dress appropriately. Now, tied closely with that rule is that you
need to wear a necktie when you’re wearing a jacket. Now, if you watch any of my videos, I break
this rule all the time. I really like this more casual look. [0:05:00]
Now, notice I always pull in a pocket square. I think this is a big thing here because when
you wear a pocket square even without wearing a necktie, I showed that, hey, I pay attention
to the details, I chose not to wear neckwear. Now, I do recommend that a man wear a tie
if it brings the outfit together especially with the collar type. Now, point collars actually are made to be
worn with a necktie. This right here is a bit of a medium spread,
so it’s going to come out in a way and it’s going to look fine. And, I think that’s what you need to pay
attention to how does the collar, how does the shirt look when you’re wearing it without
the necktie. The goal of the necktie was to bring it all
together and there are many shirts that they just look bad when not worn with a necktie. Also, pay attention to the dress code because
if it’s required, then of course wear the necktie. Next up, we’ve got the rule about taking
off your hat when you’re indoors. I say take this rule and throw it out the
window. I know that’s going to ruffle some feathers,
but here’s the thing is that whenever this rule was instituted, most men wore hats, there
were hat racks everywhere and when you walk into a place, you had a place where you could
safely put your hat. Try that nowadays, you go into a restaurant,
you go into a place and you want to take your hat off, but you’ve got to put it on the
table and it’s just going to be in the way, people are going to spill drinks on it, when
you put it on the floor, people are going to step on it. You look around, there is no coat or hat rack. I’m caring about others by keeping my hat
in a place where I know where it’s at where it’s going to be safe and it’s going to
be out of the way. Don’t mix black and brown, don’t mix black
and navy. You’re going to hear many people lay out
rules about what colors should not go with what colors. Here’s the thing is that those are general
guidelines. Those are put out to guide newbies so that
they don’t – they just don’t look really bad, but you still can pull off those color
combinations. Navy and black, I think looks perfectly fine. Black and brown, I see that on shoes all the
time where you’ve got basically the sole is going to be black and the upper is going
to be dark brown, medium brown. And, if you’re unsure about a color, okay,
practice wearing it around your house, maybe get a few opinions, take a picture put it
in my free Facebook group which I will link to down in the description. That’s a great place for people post photos
and they talk about, hey, how does this outfit look and they get great feedback. The point being get used to wearing it, build
up your confidence and when you have the confidence to wear that color combination, then just
go ahead and wear it walk out the door and feel great about how you look. The next style rule I think you can throw
out the window, you’ve got to match your metals, you’ve got to match your leathers. Now, I understand why these rules exist. When you’re just starting off, a lot of
these can be confusing and this helps you avoid just really bad looks without intending
to have that look. But, here’s the deal, you got a pair of
black shoes and you don’t want necessarily to wear a black belt, you want to wear something
a bit brighter something with color, hey, it’s summer maybe you want to go with a
pair of tan shoes and you want to go with a bright belt and the leather is just not
going to even be close. Well, you can pull off that look if you understand
what you’re doing. When it comes to metals, okay, your wedding
ring maybe is silver, your watch is you want to bring in something different, maybe you
want to go with a mixed gold. I understand I’m breaking it, but I am going
to own it and I am going to walk out with confidence. So, do you agree? Disagree? Let me know down in the comments. What video to watch next? How about this one? Ten self-destructive obsessions that guys
need to give up. I bet that you’ve got one or two of these. Yeah. Check out the video right here, guys. I will be linking to it down in the description. [0:08:12] End of audio

100 thoughts on “10 OUTDATED Style & Etiquette Rules You Need To STOP Following ASAP

  1. Should men ALWAYS pay for the first date? Let us know in the comments below!

    NEXT VIDEO: 10 Self-Destructive Obsessions Guys Need to Give Up – https://youtu.be/vha-XtZJVwU?list=PLbAUemeg-KycrlmKHzNKy0JksbwgdLWeD

  2. He's right,a true gentleman opens the door for anyone that's close behind him that's coming in the door as well..i only let it go if the person is really far awar from door

  3. I open doors for everybody, especially feminists. A fair amount of feminists are quite rude to men who open doors for them. Many of these men who open doors for women, were brought up to protect and respect women. I don't get why feminist treat good men poorly, and treat bad men who they know have done bad things with such great virtue. It is inexpedient for feminists to do this to good men. Am I going to be treated like a piece crap for opening a door for feminists? Maybe, but, I still will give them as much respect as I would give any other women in this circumstance.

  4. The gentleman should ALWAYS put himself on the danger side to protect the lady. So, if you are walking down the street, then walk on the traffic side. If you don’t want to be sexist, then feel free to change it to the stronger person should put them-self on the danger side of the weaker person. This would also extend from simply physical into social and workplace situations. If you are higher ranking and you feel that another person is being unjustly criticized or attacked, then this rule would suggest that you step in to defend them.

    I still find elbows on the table rude; as a kid when we visited my grandparents, there was typically lots of aunts, uncles and cousins, and just no room around the dining room table for elbows on the table. I also find it rude to eat on a crowded train or similar environments where most people don’t eat; “if you don’t have enough for everyone then don’t have it your-self”.

    As for paying for the first date? Sorry, I’m married!

  5. I always open the door for anyone.
    Hey guess what a thank you is not needed people. I do it because I want to. The ones who demand a thank you shouldn't open the door inthe first place "grow up".

  6. Those are some genuine rules that needs to die out. However, I have to disagree on the black and brown/navy rule. Those colours combinations are not well matched together unless we go deeper in what shade of the colour we're talking about. Some light shades of brown actually looks fantastic with black. The same goes to any colour combination.
    Scientifically, women can see more colour shades than men (if this still stands) so I guess we as men should ask women opinions on this matter or get a woman eye-sight (don't know how though heheheh).

    Thanks Antonio for the updated rules. Nice work.

  7. I guess I'm just old school wearing a suit to any interview gives a great impression, and show potential employers that your taking it series.

  8. I opened a door for someone, I’m only 15 and this 26 year old bitch starts going off at me and how kids have been taught the wrong things. Yet proceeds to walk through the door and doesn’t say thank you, I wanted to kill her, that’s how angry I was😒

  9. "For the vast majority of us, you can pretty well ignore this stuff" (at 4.00). Well, most men do ignore this "stuff". What more needs to be said about whether you are a gentleman or not. Mr. Lowest Common Denominator! Join the herd with these style rule and etiquette suggestions.

  10. Expectation to the no elbows on the table is if you are in somesort of cafeteria. There is little room and you don't want to take the space of people who are siiting beside you

  11. Basically, everyone should be treated equally. There shouldn't be special treatment for women or men.

    If you're on a date, you should split the bill in half.

  12. I opened a door for a woman one time and she actually said she didn't need my help and that she could open her own door. I responded with "yeah, that's what we have too much of today, people being nice to one another"

  13. If your date gives you trouble for opening the door then you know what you got and you know any more time with her is wasted. So by all means open that door for her and take the consequence like a man. It's in your best interest to do so.

  14. Sadly I've lived that "crazy feminist" moment. I do hold doors open for anyone regardless of what sex they are. I've still had some lunatic scream at me for being sexist when I've done held the door for her. I slammed that door in her face. She looked startled but shockingly didn't carry on screaming at me. This was in a place I used to volunteer and it was in front of staff. Someone tried to get me in trouble for it but the staff thankfully took my side as they saw what transpired and they know I hold the door for anyone.

    P.S. Interesting fact, she was a part of a group we had there called the "Womens Group"… We also had a "Mens Group" that the Womens Group tried to have shut down on a few occasions. Despite the fact that that the Mens Group was primarily a help and support group for abuse, health, anxiety, sexuality, grief, addiction and various mental health issues.

  15. Handshakes originated as two different factions meeting, and by shaking hands, showed they had no weaponry ready.

  16. Before my divorce, I always walked on street side with my wife, because I would be too tempted to push into street into oncoming bus. Just kidding. Lol 😂

  17. Do not place your hat on the table. No one wants hair or dander on the table. If removed, a hat should be placed on the back of the chair or in a open seat. 🎩

  18. Loved the video!!!

    Definitely need to keep that hat off indoors!
    Also, I was a Diesel Tech for years went on a few interviews and wore a suit to all of my interviews but one. Got offers from all of the companies but that one. – Granted you may not be doing work that requires a suit but 2 points here, 1 they are looking for mature men that know how to be presentable to customers if ever need be and help separate those backyard grease monkeys
    2 I moved into management and they remembered me wearing a suite and dressing nice years prior during my first interview they mentioned that during the interview for the promotion and I got that position also! Just saying.

  19. I walk to the left of a woman because the place of honor is on the right. For example the American flag is kept to the right of organizational flags in parades and such. I learned this from my mcjrotc class, so idk how many people are aware of this.

  20. I disagree with the handshake one – I once extended my hand first at an event and the lady (a well established university professor mind you) looked at me as if I grew another head. She and the other ladies at the event had no issues shaking hands, however from then onward I noted at the event that all of their handshakes were initiated by the ladies with the men respectfully waiting for them to do so. Further, the sad fact is that half the time I've seen other men (including those at upper management level with equal frequency) who think cleanliness is quickly flashing their fingers, sans soap, under a faucet in the restroom, and quite a few times I've seen men not even bother doing this much. That said, I don't blame that lady at all for wanting handshaking to be at her discretion.

  21. Hopefully, a woman will get triggered by some petty annoyance early in my interactions with her. People who get triggered easily are worth the effort. The effort it takes to avoid them.

  22. I won’t hold the door anymore for anyone staring down at their phone coz you know they won’t realise and won’t say thankyou.
    Also after living in France, don’t hold the door, they look at you like you’re crazy!

  23. So where dos Trump end up on the style O meter ? 1. Fashion victim. 2. Dedicated follower of fashion . C. Slave to fashion. 4. Fashion newbie. 5. moron .

  24. 🤔 In Europe we kiss both cheeks instead of shaking, when greeting women.

    Didn't know about letting her shake hands first

  25. I generally put myself on the roadside of the sidewalk when walking with a woman in an area I know and feel safe or if we have been drinking. Somewhere unfamiliar I put myself on her left side because I'm left handed and may need my left hand free to draw my "modern sword".

  26. i thought the ties purpose was to cover the buttons (which were seen as private) on the undershirt (Dress shirt).

  27. Thanks. Mostly, these are good suggestions but the "no elbows on the table rule" is practical. Some tables are unstable (yes, even today) and it's still very embarrassing when you tip people's drinks or food because you have ignored this old, but still relevant, rule. At the very least, be very very careful with this one, guys.

  28. Haven't been single in a while but for the first date, how about saying "In the past I would offer to pay, but I know that these are different times, so let's do Dutch" that way, she understands you're up to date with social norms and if she's into you, will still be up for a second date. How can you find fault with that logic??

    Gents, on a side note, never, ever approach a woman and offer to buy her a drink right off the bat. She will almost always accept even if not interested in you!

  29. The whole walk to the left of a woman, I was taught by my parents that when you're walking on the sidewalk with a woman, always walk on the side closest to the street to keep her a bit farther from potential harm

  30. Sometimes I sincerely wonder, is it a good idea to be a decent man in indecent times? Seems like the first world and women collectively are waging war on men, boys and masculinity itself. Yet we are still being asked to behave according to model that we keep hearing was bad!

  31. Love your show, but hats indoors are disrespectful and look very much out of place. Risky to do do, rewards, usually none.

  32. I agree with everything except the hat. Always take it off while indoors. Especially while eating at a table or if you are a country western star at an awards show.

  33. Hey. I agree, If you feel comfortable in any clothing combo or color blend…..go for it.
    I happen to be a bit more of a traditionalist, but, hey, that's just me.
    You be you

  34. I heard once in the 1970's that a guy wore a tuxedo to work because it felt good. He worked on a auto assembly line.

  35. I showed up for an interview at UPS loading trucks in a suit

    I didn't get a second interview
    but he did compliment the suit; lessons learned

  36. Wearing POCKET SQUARES during business hours is also a DEFINITE NO-NO. Even after-hours, they come across as pretentious and pompous.

  37. Oh, so all of you guys walk on the left side of the walkway, to protect your lady from car splashes, etc.? Really? And you do this to protect her from the pedestrian traffic on the walkway? Really? Well, in the USA, pedestrians ARE SUPPOSED to walk on the right on walkways (and enter a building thru the right door and not the left, because the left is the exit door, and the same with stairs and escolaters), meaning the gentleman is on the left of his lady as they are walking on the right side of the walkway, the gentleman's shoulder always faces the street; so, you would walk on the left of your lady going or coming on the walkway. As pedestrians, crossing a street, the man's shoulder should always be facing the stopped traffic, if any. (PS-I retired my sword 33 years ago! This is a private joke, that only about 5% of the population knows about.)

    Off topic comment: When waiting for an elevator, why don't the people on the outside of the door, wait for the people who will be getting off the elevator first, BEFORE THEY GO CHARGING IN LIKE A HERD OF CATTLE!? And, while in an elevator, a gentleman always removes his hat, and puts it back on while exiting the elevator.

  38. The problem with this kind of video is that it takes no account of other cultures. I can assure you, the rest of the world does not want to be American

  39. I believe you my have the sides mixed up because you escort a woman on your left arm leaving your strong side free. The other one is as a male you should be on the side closest to the road.

  40. Elbows on the table is acceptable between courses. So, did servants come and support the table between courses to allow the noble folk to rest their elbows on the table whilst they conversed between courses? Also, if the tables were so unstable, they wouldn’t support a group of diners eating a meal.

    If you don’t wear a suit to an interview, you don’t want the job. Even if applying to work at Google.

    Walk on the side that is closest to traffic when accompanying a lady or child.

    If someone holds a door open for you, reach out and touch the handle as if to say, “I have it from here”, relieving them of their duty. And always thank them.

    If I hold a door open for you and you just walk through without so much as a “Kiss my arse”, I’m going to drag you back outside and slam that door in your face. 🤣

  41. Not putting elbows on the table was never a rule of etiquette but was told to children to stop them wearing out the elbows of their clothes.

  42. Women:
    Want equal rights, equal opportunities in the workplace, and equal salary. But still expect men to pay on the first date.

  43. Oxblood leather jacket with blacked out zippers with black boots and a black belt I think looks great.

    First MFG Night rider is a good example.

  44. A gentleman also walked on the left side of a lady in public to offer some protection from mud or other items being flung up by wheeled vehicles on to the public walk (also maybe to throw himself in the way of a runaway horse).

  45. Oh come on, always pay for the first Date? Bc 9 of 10 Women " like" that? What a strange reason.
    I can Read a Lot of her reaction if I dont automaticall pay in the First Date. Dont let that Go.
    Elbows: dont want to look at someone with no Pictures. And than the " teaching part",,, no One like to be schooled..What are you?

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