How Does Sexuality Affect Style? • In The Closet

How Does Sexuality Affect Style? • In The Closet


– What kind of mad fart – I don’t know.
was that loud but also sounded far away? (laughting) (upbeat horn music) – Hi everybody, so, welcome to The Closet. I’m Jen, that’s Niki. Today, we’re gonna talk a
little bit about personal style, specifically, how your style might change after you come out. To talk about this, I
have my friend Ashly here. Ashly, you wanna come on, crawl in through the closet side door. – Yeah, I’ve always seen it
online, but I didn’t realize how cramped it was til I was here. – Nah, it’s crampled as fuck. – Should I just sit like this? – Is that comfortable for you? – I don’t know. – Okay. (laughting) – Hi Jen. – How are you?
– I’m good. – Tell me a little bit about yourself. What are your pronouns, what’s
you’re favorite thing to eat? – My name is Ashly, my
pronouns are she, her. – Cool. – For a second I forgot
what pronouns were, I was like, fuck, they are she, her. And my favorite thing to eat is soup. I love a good soup. – What? – Yeah, everyone is weirded out by that. If I could eat only one
thing it would be soup. There’s so many kinds. There’s stews, there’s
soups, there’s like, different flavors. – But, soup? – Yeah, I like soup, in short. And I’m gay. Well, what am I, I’m queer. – Queer? Okay. – That’s cool. – After I came out as queer
I went, like, every way on the style spectrum. I was like super masculine, super feminine, like chapstick, lipstick. I was in a sorority before,
and so, like, everything was super feminine and I
always remember feeling, like, really awkward about what I was wearing and my clothes and that kind of stuff. And so after I came out I was like, “Oh, good, I can finally be myself.” But it was funny ’cause I was like, “I don’t know how to be gay,” and so I bought a bunch of snapbacks and button-ups and Vans and stuff and that didn’t feel completely right either. – You bought Niki’s wardrobe. – I bought Niki’s exact wardrobe. I did the easiest thing I could
do, was just copy clothing. – And then I was, like, exposed to more and different types of
queer women, and I was like, “Oh, they kinda all just
have their own style,” so, I didn’t have to do
it one particular way. Did you cut your hair after you came out? – I did. I cut my hair during
the same year I started really fully dating and just being out. – Did you feel more comfortable afterward, or were you a little
scared, like, “Oh, man.” – Now everyone knows. – I did it, like, ’cause I
was, I wanted the convenience of not having long hair. When I was younger there
was so much of trying to hide people from knowing I was gay. When I cut my hair I was like, “Oh, am I letting them win?” Feeling like yourself. – Yeah. – Being able to get to a
place where you can feel like yourself in your clothes
and also be comfortable with everyone seeing
that you are yourself. – Being a queer person
kinda complicates that, but I also think it’s kinda cool, you get to paint your own palette and decide what makes you comfortable. It’s hard to sit in
this closet for my back. Let’s talk about back
issues in the closet. – Y’all know this game. It’s called Spin the Bottle. We ask a question, we spin the bottle, and then whoever it lands on
has to answer it honestly. Have you ever farted during sex? Here we go! – Jen! – Me! I feel like, yeah, I’ve farted,
but it’s never been noticed. One time the girl I was
dating at the time farted and I felt so bad because
I didn’t immediately identify it as a fart. – Oh my God.
I didn’t know it was a fart, so, like, I jumped, and I
was like, “What was that?” Like, I sounded really offended. If I had known it was a fart
I wouldn’t have said anything. I felt like a book
shelf fell, so I, like– – It was that loud? – It was like, pretty loud, but I– – I mean, it can get precarious down there ’cause depending on
where you are you might be really close to someone’s lower parts. – Oh, yeah. – And then it can get, like, caught. – Yup. – Like, between, like,
bed sheets and your face. What’s the grosses thing
you’ve ever done. Niki? – I don’t know. I will, like, regularly pick boogers. – Oh, that’s disgusting, Niki. Get the fuck out. Anyway, thanks for coming to The Closet. – Thank you for having me.
It was real fun. – [Niki] Yeah, thanks for coming! – This was great, be
yourselves, little queer angels. Yeah, don’t open that.
– Don’t open, don’t. – Open it and drink it. – Don’t, don’t. – Oh, it didn’t do anything. – It so immediately smells
just like pure orange. That expired two years ago. – Should we leave the closet, Ashly? – Yeah, let’s leave the closet. – All right, we’re gonna leave the closet. – Good-bye, friends.
– Bye! Thanks for being gay and nice. Okay. Cut! – [Ashly] That was fun!

100 thoughts on “How Does Sexuality Affect Style? • In The Closet

  1. What's the difference between gay and queer? We don't have the equivalent in my mother tongue so I don't know what it means :/

  2. I feel like my style is affected less by being queer and more by having ADHD. I keep my hair short not because of anything to do with masculinity or femininity, but because this last time that I tried to grow it out I got massive tangles in it that literally needed to be cut out. I just can't deal with trying to maintain it every day, especially since my hair is super thick.

  3. It’s all my favorite buzzfeed people in one room (even tho Ashly isn’t working with buzzfeed anymore)

  4. I wear whatever I find in my room but I don't really have femminine clothing so I guess I wear more masculine clothing idk? But I'm gay 🌈

  5. I got a feminine pixie cut when I was sorta confused. Then, after coming out to close family and friends, I started looking precisely like Dan Howell. Clothing, hair, and everything else.

  6. I'm queer but I don't get the whole "I'm gonna try to dress this way because other queer women do it". thing. If femme is your style then do it. If it's masc then do it. Isn't trying to look a certain way to fit in with other queer women enforcing the stereotype that LGBTQ+ people have to dress a certain way to be valid LGBTQ+? Changing my style didn't even come to mind when I realized I liked girls but I've noticed it's a common thing that queer people seem to do. It's funny because I liked snapbacks and flannel before I knew it was a lesbian stereotype. I feel like alot of people are gonna misinterpret all this and think I'm insulting butch queer women but that's just something that's always confused me.

  7. Really interested topic! We talked about what we learned from coming out on our channel! Check it out! <3 xo

  8. I wear baggy dark colored jackets with patches and jeans with a black shirt underneath most of the time

  9. I just came out as pan and I dress in a pretty equal mix of masculine and feminine. Some days I'll wear a dress and a jean jacket with makeup, and sometimes, like today, I'll go bare-faced with a button down collared shirt and jeans.

  10. Hah my style changed after I came out because I now have short hair (my clothes haven’t changed but I do want button ups or flannels because they’re cool (and also hell yeah embrace the gay))

  11. Okay. Well I am BI. I have also been told that I don't look BI, or dress BI, or act BI. I am so confused as to what that means exactly.

  12. As a straight woman, I still find Jen just incredibly appealing. In that I mean shes adorable, she's pretty, and her personality is just hilarious. Shes just completely awesome!

  13. Jen, I'm a straight woman, but my friends say that I look like I'd be gay. I work a labor intensive job, I don't care about my style on most days.

  14. Literally started wearing whatever I want (from super retro to punk to toboyish to edgy street to Lolita and kawaii) since I came out as asexual lol
    Used to wear girl next door before this and now it is so much more fun :)))))

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